What Are Your Guys Really Laughing At?

In every team I’ve coached — and in the teams I grew up in — laughter was the soundtrack. We treated it like a sign of connection, chemistry, even culture. But I’ve been realizing something uncomfortable: not all laughter builds a team… and a lot of it breaks boys down in ways we never see. Last week I wrote about the ways humor becomes both the shield boys hide behind and the sword they swing at each other — and why coaches can’t afford to ignore it anymore.
If you work with young men, this is one you’ll want to read.

COACH PROMPTS

• Where in your program does humor go unchecked — and what’s the real message players are learning from that silence?

• When’s the last time you interrupted a laugh that didn’t sit right? What stopped you the last time you didn’t?

• If your players were asked what kinds of jokes a teammate can “get away with,” what would their honest answer be — and what does that tell you?

PLAYER PROMPTS

• Think about the last time everyone laughed in the locker room. Was the joke about something true — or something someone was trying to hide?

• Whose feelings are easiest to ignore when the laughter starts? Why is that?

• What’s one joke you laughed at this week that you wouldn’t want someone using on you?