Boy Math
Sometimes our blog shares posts and or events that need some framing from you the coach to make it palatable for your players. Sometimes we ask you to do some “gymnastics” with the content in order to get to the real lesson in sharing it with your guys.
Today, we aren’t doing that.
Today, you can just put this graphic up as is (originally posted on IG by @stay.at.home.tom) and be quiet for awhile.
Let your guys read the captions (hell, you probably don’t even need this specific graphic, you can just read or write the stats out for your team to see). Then deploy a familiar TeamsOfMen tool (embrace the silence) and sit back and LISTEN.
Which one of those stats surprise them?
Which one’s make them uncomfortable?
Which one’s did they know in advance?
This is a Manbox myth busting list. This a cliche busting list. But it’s also going to ruffle “some feathers” in your space because you, your coaches and your players have most likely been hearing some of this “boy math” your whole life. You’ve been told my men you respect that these “boy math” statements are facts to live by.
So, maybe when one of your guys pushes back, don’t immediately tell him why he’s wrong. Ask him where he learned it. Who told you women were worse drivers? Who taught you that women were “too emotional”? Where did you learn what work “counts” inside a household? Who taught you that being sensitive or empathetic was somehow a weakness?
Using this session is a first step toward UNLEARNING that nonsense and, at the very least, planting the “hmmm, there might be some things I’ve been taught that I need to question” seed in their minds.
And that is the entire point of what we do.
Not telling young men WHAT to think, but teaching them to examine WHY they think it.
Coach Prompts
Which one of these claims would YOU have pushed back against when you were your players' age?
What beliefs about women did men you respected hand down to you that you later had to question or unlearn?
Can you let a player openly disagree with one of these claims long enough to understand WHERE his belief came from before you try to change it?
Player Prompts
Which one of these claims did you immediately want to argue with? Why?
Who or what taught you what you currently believe about that claim?
What is something you believe about men or women that you've honestly never stopped to question where you learned it?
You can't build Decision Confidence without examining the beliefs underneath the decision. Sometimes the first rep is simply asking: “Who taught me that?”
